5 Things We Should All Stop Apologising For

If you are up to date with my blog then you will know that I am trying to better myself and something I am so guilty of is trying to please everyone and over apologising when I shouldn’t. This year has been so eventful and I have learned to put myself first for the first time ever and that means that I have more of a tendency to cancel plans without proper notice and speak more openly about how I feel. Even though being polite is something I am proud to be, I find myself aimlessly apologising for either things that aren’t my fault or even in situations where sorry doesn’t need to be said.

IMG_9220.JPG

My Feelings

The biggest thing I apologise for is my feelings. As you all know, depression is a huge part of my life and I do struggle a lot and every time I have a bad day I apologise for it, but why am I apologising for something I can’t control? Most of the time my bad moods are caused by nothing other than the lack of chemicals in my brain so I feel like it’s not a valid excuse to be sad when I know I could be talking to someone who has just heard bad news or are having a stressful day at work. I am slowly learning that it’s okay to speak out about how I feel, whether I am sad for a reason or not. And if other people around me are sad then that doesn’t mean I have to hide my sadness.

My Appearance

Next is my appearance. Something I see all the time is people apologise if they’re not glammed up and I too apologise for it way too often. But realistically if I rock up to a coffee date in comfy clothes and no makeup I doubt my other half will even care, he would just be happy being in my company. Everyone is too worried about themselves to pay attention and judge whether your winged eyeliner is even or if you are wearing a baggy hoodie. So stop apologising and love yourself!!

IMG_9219.JPG

Saying No

This year I have really tried to sort out my priorities and have said no a lot more. My whole life I have been told to say yes to every opportunity, so I had a severe case of FOMO. But I quickly learned that it is impossible to see all of your friends, go to family parties, put 100% into your work and have hobbies. So I am trying to put my big girl pants on and actually say no to things that aren’t on the top of my priority list for that week. Sometimes there might not be a blog post uploaded, or I might not go for a pint down the pub and that’s okay, it doesn’t mean I am letting anyone down.

Not being ‘ladylike’

If you are a weekly reader of my blog then you will know how passionate I am about feminism and being equal is something I strive for and even though I have strong beliefs I sometimes find myself slipping into a cycle of apologising for not fitting into societies mould of ‘ladylike’ and contemplating changing. Should I only drink prosecco at a bar? Should I lose weight? Should I stop swearing? Should I always sit upright with my legs crossed? My answer to that is: No fucking way. For an example, if I burp I automatically apologise for no reason other than it’s not ladylike and not because it’s rude, but why? Why is burping, a normal body function, something only men can do? Fuck societies idea of a woman, if you want to wear clothes from the men’s department then do it, if you want to swear or shout or have one night stands, do it. Wear makeup or don’t, it doesn’t matter. Be you.

IMG_9051

Not replying to a message straight away

If you are my friend then you will know how bad I am at quick replies, I always get distracted by the chaos in my day to day life. So saying ‘sorry for not replying sooner’ is becoming more and more common and I automatically get overwhelmed with guilt and I know that I am not the only one who feels obliged to reply quickly. But if they are your true friends then they will understand that you have other commitments that you can’t always drop.

Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoyed. What do you want to try and stop apologising for?

Until next time,

68367693633427F7A92AA6FE067EB16F

Like my posts? Buy me a coffee!

RECENT POST | INSTAGRAM | TWITTER

31 thoughts on “5 Things We Should All Stop Apologising For

  1. 50shad3s0fjay says:

    Yes! Love this, well done girl. So many people could learn from this 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 There are times to say sorry but most of the time, people are saying it for no reason or through a lack of self love. Enough is enough! Love this post girl thank you xxx

    Like

  2. don't give a jam says:

    YES!!! insaneeeee how often sorry is thrown around when it’s not something to be sorry about! loveeee what you said about feelings & SO TRUE about the ladylike thing & just loving yourself 💛 LOVE THIS!

    Like

    • chloeburford says:

      Sorry is used so many times unnecessarily that its now a regular word now and doesn’t really have the amount of power it should when it is genuinely needed. Thank you so much for commenting, I am so pleased you agree!xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. autumngirl says:

    Love love love this post, it’s so important to emphasise the fact that we all apologize for literally everything when there is absolutely no need. And the whole thing about being ladylike is so, so true, why should we feel the need to apologize for the things which men go about doing every day? Self-love is so, so important and I don’t think there are enough blog posts out there emphasising that point, so I’m glad you have brought it up. Thank you! xx

    Like

    • chloeburford says:

      Omg you angel, thank you so so so much!! You always leave the sweetest comments. I feel like there are so many things that men do which are almost expected, but as soon as women do the same everyone loses their minds!! Its about time we all start standing our ground and also love ourselves more!! xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Chanelle says:

    Your posts are always relatable! I totally agree with your first and last points. It can be hard to know when to talk about your feelings and that can lead to overthinking and becoming paranoid that others will think you’re seeking attention or being overly dramatic but like you say it’s a chemical imbalance that can make people like that. If you can’t open yourself and share feelings around people you can trust and who are supposedly your friends you need to find people who you do feel comfortable talking to. I think the pressure to respond to messages quickly comes from the assumption everyone is always on their phone when sometimes they’re not and they’re out living or at lunch with family and someone is not ignoring your message, they are genuinely busy in that moment. If people can’t accept you’re not going to reply within 5 seconds, it needs to be brought up and discussed – it’s not fun to feel boxed in xx

    Like

    • chloeburford says:

      Thank you so much, it makes me so happy to hear that my posts are relatable. Its so so difficult trying to open up about feeling, especially when others feel down too. But its so important to remember that our feelings are just as valid as theirs!! Thats so true – I think its also an age thing, people assume that because we’re young we are glued to our phones! Thank you so much once again for reading and leaving such a thoughtful comment xxx

      Liked by 1 person

      • Chanelle says:

        I don’t like to spend too much time on my phone. When I tell people I’m not a big Facebook user and I don’t have Snapchat they look at me strange haha x

        Like

  5. Sophiemagsblog says:

    This was such a needed post and a great reminder as to the downfalls of how people these days end up lacking self confidence! I am such a bad replier but its great because I don’t feel the pressure to reply and its also nice not to be on my phone constantly.

    Like

  6. Chloe Luna says:

    I literally say sorry for…absolutely everything. I don’t know if it has something to do with the fact I’m British and therefore we just say sorry all the time anyway, or if it’s to do with the fact that I’m a woman and am therefore made to feel like I take up too much space and have to therefore apologise for simply existing. Maybe a bit of both. Mix that with my anxiety and paranoia about the fact I think everyone secretly hates me, and all I ever do is apologise. It’s like, whenever anything happens that’s the first word that comes out of my mouth without a second thought. This was such a great post and I really really love the idea, thank you so much for sharing as always lovely .xxx

    Like

    • chloeburford says:

      You are always so freaking thoughtful when it comes to commenting so thank you so much for always being so supportive and lovely. I think it defo does have something to with being british, we are known for aimlessly apologising! Anxiety definitely doesn’t help, as soon as I start to get paranoid its just a spiral of apologies! Thank you so much for commenting and sharing your thoughts honey xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Shannon says:

    I’m so guilty of ALL of these!! Apologising for slow replies is the absolute worst one though because why am I apologising for being busy and not being available 24/7? It’s so unrealistic and I don’t know why I feel like I need to apologise for it! This post has actually made me realise how much I apologise for everything and how much I need to stop hahah xxxx

    Like

    • chloeburford says:

      Its so so frustrating because people moan when youre on your phone too much but then moan when you dont reply fast enough! You just cant win!! Yes girl lets make a pact to stop apologising for things that we dont need to. Thank you so much for reading and leaving such a sweet comment as always!xxx

      Like

  8. Hannah says:

    One thing I have been trying to do over the past few months is to stop wearing make-up to work and when doing chores and to stop apologising for turning up to work make-up less. Now it is a special occasion when I wear make-up out and I appreciate it more rather than feeling like it is a chore because I have to do it. Also definitely enjoying those extra 15 minutes of sleep in the morning!
    Great post as always. xx

    Like

  9. Amelia in Hull says:

    100% agree with all these! People are just busy and it’s not always convenient to reply to a message until later on. P.s thank you so much for your support of my blog I’ve loved reading the comments you’ve left on my posts xx

    Like

    • chloeburford says:

      Thank you so much for reading and supporting me honey! I so appreciate it. Thats so true – like I am never always have the time to message back straight away and I absolutely hate feeling the need to apologise!! xxx

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s